For those who know me, I’m back!
For those who don’t, read my previous posts, comment, wonder where I disappeared to, and......... I’m back!
I’ve been missing for a while - partly because I’m busy with school, partly because I don’t have Internet, but mostly because I am very lazy and prefer to spend my free time playing Temple Run.
But enough about my hobbies. Let’s talk about me. Some may wonder who I am. My name is G. And I crush on boys who I do not know.
They say the first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem. But to “them” I say: It’s not a problem, goddammit! I simply have a crush on a guy in my class who I have never spoken to. That’s right. No cordial “hello” in the hallway. No awkward weather talk while waiting at the bus stop. Only a stifled, whispered “you’re beautiful” as he walks out of the classroom. Creepy? It’s debatable.
I’m sure you’ve been there. We have all crushed on someone, guy or girl, who we didn’t know. For grammar’s sake, let’s assume he’s a boy. We have all wondered what he would be like, too. Funny? Philanthropic? Obsessed with playing Dungeons and Dragons in his mom’s basement? The sad truth is, we will never know what qualities this special person possesses - unless we talk to him. But this blog post isn’t one of those useless, self-help “How To Talk To Your Crush” scenarios. It’s hypothetical - and probably completely inaccurate. And so I present to you:
G’s List of 10 Men That Hottie In Your Class Could Be... If Only You’d Talk To Him.
|Pierce Brosnan as 'James Bond'|
1. Spy/Secret Agent. But not James Bond, Jack Bauer or Jason Bourne. I’m talking Drew Barrymore in ‘Never Been Kissed’. This guy you’re crushing on is really just a redheaded actress disguised as a male disguised as a college student - for the sole purpose of acquiring secret intel of the school. He is most likely awkward and insecure with a questionable interest in Charlie’s Angels. When approached with the subject of dating or, God forbid, kissing women, he sweats, clams up, and stutters. Despite this weird aversion to females, he is not to be confused with #2.
, by Filomena P